Train Up a Child....and all that jazz

 “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6

I don’t know about you, but nobody ever told me that proverbs weren’t promises. I mean, I don’t remember anyone ever explicitly telling me that they WERE promises, but I do know that I grew up hearing that the Bible was unquestionably true, God breathed and infallible. So it would stand to reason that this would be a promise, right? 

I have endured a lot of shame in my own self because of this proverb. I mean, this was the plan. Train them up in the way of the Lord! Always and amen! That was the point. Even without the promise, that was the point. But it just made sense. This was most certainly "the formula". I knew plenty of people who used this formula, and it worked. Why wouldn't it for me as well?

I’m here to tell you, it’s not the formula. It’s not a promise. Just in the last few years have I really figured out what a proverb is. It’s literally just a saying that is true most of the time. Like, usually it works out that way because it just makes sense. 

It seems that God didn’t see fit to make it make sense for all of my kids. Once again, I take all the criticism for this on myself. (Hello, Stress 1 again.) Surely I missed something. I blame myself for teaching my oldest to be a “Warrior.” Then again, maybe it’s just because I homeschooled him. Maybe if we had just been normal, I wouldn’t have been around that language and taught him that at all. Maybe if I had known more about how to ask for help, if I hadn’t been so prideful, if I…if I…

So no, for now, this has not been a true proverb for me, for our family. Yes, I’ve heard the interpretation that in Hebrew this would’ve meant vocation, inclination. And sure, yes, that makes sense. But this also has to do with the heart…with “the way.” Train them in “the way” and they will not depart.

And yet, the person who wrote this, Solomon, departed from The Way. He departed from wisdom and lived a life of debauchery with 700 wives and 300 concubines. The proverb for his parents did not come true either.

And maybe this will still be true for our family. Maybe I just haven't waited long enough. I do believe that God works miracles, and I pray for them all the time within my own nuclear family. Maybe these wayward children of mine will still come back to "The Way". I certainly hope that one day I will have a great testimony about this. One day I would love to have a story good enough to share on my church's "Live Deeply" instagram page to show how God heard my cries in the wilderness. Isn't it interesting how the stories are always complete? Just once I'd like to read someone's story who is like, "Yep, I'm still sitting here, still in the wilderness, still waiting on God."

I guess that's why I write. I guess that's why I publish this stuff even if no one is reading. Maybe someone somewhere who needs it will stumble across it and feel solidarity. 

Yep. I'm still here, still in the wilderness, still waiting on God.